On Every Street

There's gotta be a record of you some place 
You gotta be on somebody's books 
The lowdown - a picture of your face 
Your injured looks 
The sacred and profane 
The pleasure and the pain 
Somewhere your fingerprints remain concrete 
And it's your face I'm looking for on every street 


A three-chord symphony crashes into space 
The moon is hanging upside down 
I don't know why it is I'm still on the case 
It's a ravenous town 
And you still refuse to be traced 
Seems to me such a waste 
And every victory has a taste that's bittersweet 
And it's your face I'm looking for on every street

At Peace

I've been talking to the person in me. The other guy. We all have one. That unbelievably perfect, profound... That somebody who we aren't, but we are at the same time.

We've come to terms about certain things. He wont invade my head, and make me feel like a Schizophrenic, and I will always consult that part of my head when I'm willing to take the risk. It's like the System from the Batman Comics. When it takes over it makes you do some pretty crazy things.

I'm happy I wrote the last post, even if it cost me all my readers. I think it's essential you know who's writing what you read, so you don't go equally mad, or misunderstand something.

Sometimes I feel like a combination of the Joker from Batman, and the Sandman from Spiderman. A half-psychotic reluctant villain. I... Understand the feeling weather I like or dislike it, and I am willing to accept as part of being me.

Weather or not you read this blog, I will continue to write. It's become more of a ritual for me. I use this blog as a way of letting go, and coming to terms with myself.  

May The Force Be With You.

What If I Told You...

I think I've become a paranoid schizophrenic. I'm afraid of thinking... Sometimes the things or thoughts that form in my head scare me. I know for a fact, that even thinking a thought can change a person, and also that persons thought processes. I'm scared of thinking thanks to this.

I was really mad at my sister at home one day. Like ultrasuperuberMAD (trying hard not to add an expletive there). I was just looking around the room, and I identified ten objects that I can easily use to... Incapacitate her. I just thought whoa! What the fuck is happening to my brain all of a sudden!

I don't play these kinds of games, watch violent movies, or anything! My head just... Created it for me.
I'm scared.

I don't want to talk to anyone anymore.

I want to slide contently into senility, with the security of isolation.

Can you help me?

Problematic Conversation

I talk. A lot. Like you didn't know...

The problem really is, I don't know how to talk to people anymore. I feel like saying lots and talking to people and telling them they DON'T have an ugly nose and all... But... I think I've either really shy, or I don't want to overextend a relationship that just came to be. After a long time of being under cryostatis. 

I wish life would be just a tad easier. I wish you could say what you wanted, and people would understand it exactly the easy you wanted them to. Well I guess that's the fun of it. Life that is. Hard as hell to get what you want across, in the right manner and comprehension. 

I don't know if I can say this

I don't know if I should,

Whatever you say about 

You and your face,

You look really good!

God?

Yes I'm alive. No I didn't post for a very long time. Yes I'm really sorry.
I wanted to share a conversation I had with a friend of mine.

Me: Dude, do you believe in God?
Friend: Yeah
Me: So can I ask you a few questions?
Friend: Bash on regardless! (PG Wodehouse buff) 
Me: Can God do anything?
Friend: Yeah.
Me: Can he make anything?
Friend: Definitely.
Me: So can he make a rock?
Friend: Yes.
Me: Can he make a really big rock?
Friend: Obviously.
Me: Can he make a rock larger than he can carry?

I think you got the point. He started laughing after I'd asked the last question. People I tell you. This is called using logic like a badass!

Mosaics

I went to a place for lunch today. It was called Candies. It was really beautiful, with a whole lot of interesting mosaics. I took some pictures of them, and I'd like to share them with you. There were 28 mosaics and pictures in all, but I took pictures of only five of them. (Maybe I'm trying to tell you more about me. Hint hint!)

The Speed of Sound

Why? Questions that I need an answer for, I never seem to get. I'm sitting here on my dining table with my iPad at 11:30 at night and I'm sort of wondering what I'm doing here. In the broader scheme of things. What makes me want to blog at this time of the night? Everyone else at home is asleep. Do I want to talk to you? Do I want to say something? Is it a subconscious desire of mine, that compels me to write about the ethereal? My human sense of curiosity that makes me want to discover what's beyond? Could it be the Coldplay in my ears? The very music that drives my being? A tear rolls down my cheek. I ponder upon its existence. Why am I crying? It is not because I'm sad. I'm just wondering about everything. I begin to understand. I see the larger picture. My emotions roll over each other, creating a jumbled mess of mind, body and soul. All sense of meaning eludes me. I start to see pictures of people and places. I begin to hear sound. Laughter, happiness, a strange beat that seems to originate from within my chest. I begin to wonder about my existence. I wonder about that beat from my chest. Is it really there? Or is ir a figment of my imagination that wants me to believe I am alive. Is it maybe driven by the hope that someone, somewhere wants me to exist. It is pitch black. The only light is the glare from my screen. I feel a warm embrace, but there is not a soul around me. Maybe it is the wind. A warm shiver runs through my body. It reassures me of my existence. I am alive.